Last week I alluded to a current inner struggle. It would be my desire this morning, as I sit down to write today’s thought, to gloss over it and move on. I can’t, because that struggle carries with it another piece to the growing-up puzzle. I’m a doer. It’s much easier to be a doer, than it is to be a be-er. In the past, that has been out of balance. The Lord has been teaching me to simply “be;” and, gotta say, I’ve truly enjoyed the classroom.
Since leaving Arizona Christian University, this season of learning what it means to just “be” has been good. However, almost a year ago, I truly thought I heard the Lord’s still-small-voice letting me know that it was time to add some “doing” again. Not just random doing, intentional serving…as in “use-my-spiritual-giftedness-to-His-glory” serving. Oh, I never stopped traveling and speaking; and my calendar is fairly full. My norm, though, is that in between traveling, I’m used to serving the Lord in some capacity locally. This is tricky, of course, because of the inconsistency. My position at ACU was perfect, because it was a built-in way to do what I love to do, on those terms. So here, at home, in Pagosa Springs, I just haven’t found my place (sigh). I’m not one to go creating ministry, I’ve always believed the Lord opens that door for me…and has in the past. Hence, there is this inner warfare, and I’m mulling over a lot of different angles with this in mind.
That said, I would add this: “Hands down, I am most fulfilled when able to operate in the realm of my spiritual giftedness.” I’ve heard myself say those words quite often. They are true for me, which is why this current situation has been such a struggle; and, because it is on my mind so much, is it any surprise that the Lord, in connection with His Word, has used this to explain more about maturity? Of course not!
I started connecting the dots when I jotted that highlighted, italicized sentence above in my journal the other day. That same day, I happened (right!) to be focusing on a new focal verse for study that included the word mature in Ephesians 4. The word “mature” happened (right!) to be sprinkled in the middle of a passage on spiritual gifts. Let me show you:
And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ…Ephesians 4:11-16 (emphasis mine)
So, here was my take away: because this is key to the growing-up puzzle, I am assured that there are places the Lord has for me to use what He has given me. I simply need to pay attention. Keep my eyes open. I was reminded that ministry isn’t just something that I step outside of my home to do and then step back into the comforts of my isolated life. No, ministry is my life and my life is ministry. When I grab wholeheartedly to that mindset, I am in the process of growing up…and I will find myself most fulfilled, satisfied, and, yes, even happy in my faith.
God never intended for us to be consumers only. When we man-up, church, we become committed, sold-out servers in partnership with the Spirit of God. Where are you using your gifts? Are you paying attention for areas of service? Are you looking, as you go about your daily routine for ways to do that which comes naturally to you? It’s quite easy to become complacent, isolated, by-standers. Yet, I know from experience that once I engage, and am useful in the Kingdom, I enjoy the experience of service. Long for it, in fact.
P.S. Oh, and one more thing. When I’m most fulfilled, I am most satisfied in the Lord, and when I am most satisfied in the Lord, God is most glorified. It’s a WIN-WIN!
